“Dad, it’s nothing like that at all between us. I … I don’t regret that you pushed me. I don’t. And you can’t punish yourself for what happened with Mom, either. I’m sure there were a lot of things going on with her that all contributed, but I don’t think that was the only reason she did it. She needed help. She needed help and she didn’t get it, but that doesn’t mean that it was because of you. You’ve been a good dad.”

  He scoffed. “I’ve let you down at each and every turn, Jennifer. I was so worried about you following the same path as your mother that I pushed you into an unhappy life and cut you off from one of the only things that connected you to your mother. And something at which you are truly gifted.” He stood abruptly and walked to the far wall where her pieces were stacked up against each other. Flipping through one after another, he continued until he stopped short and pulled one canvas out. He held it up in his hands and pulled it back so he could see it better. Putting his hand over his mouth, he turned back to her.

  “This picture, how did you paint it?”

  “It was one of my favorites growing up. I always had dreams about me and Mom making the cookies, but it was always incomplete. I looked for it sometimes when you were out of the house, but I could never find it. I’ve painted it so many times over the years, but it always feels incomplete and I can’t place my finger on it.” Her dad pulled his wallet out of his back pocket and walked over to her.

  “I think I might know why.” He showed her a wallet sized version of the picture that haunted her for years and held it out to her. There on the other side of a six-year-old Jen, adding chocolate chips to the batter was her father, the biggest smile she’d ever seen on his face before. And he looked over her head at her mother with so much love in his eyes that it brought tears to hers.

  “It was so hard for me to see that picture on the mantle every day after she died. But I couldn’t part with it. I had a wallet sized version made up, so I could carry it with me always. Even when I screwed things up with you in unimaginable ways, I want you to know that I always loved you with all my heart. You’ve just always reminded me so much of her that sometimes it was hard not to try fix what I thought I had done wrong. I can see now how that probably made things worse, but I was trying. I promise.” Covering his hand with hers, she squeezed it.

  “I know, Dad, I know.”

  “I was just so afraid of losing you too.”

  “I know Dad, and when you’re scared of losing something, sometimes your actions push them away even harder.”

  After her dad left, she was completely exhausted. Sitting on the couch, she eyed the evaluator envelope that Mark had given her. She’d been too nervous earlier to open it to see what they thought of her work. The fact that they liked it enough to give her the fellowship did nothing to quell the squirrels that were running around in her stomach. She picked it up and turned it over, unsealed it, then slid out the stack of papers and went through them one by one.

  “Truly gifted at expressive interpretation of real-life subjects …”

  “… raw talent used to expose the true nature of the subjects …”

  “…visually and conceptually stunning …”

  Her phone vibrated on the coffee table. She picked it up and checked the message.

  Mark: I know I’m the last person you want to talk to right now, but I’m downstairs and I need to talk to you.

  She wasn’t ready to talk to him right now. Everything was too raw, too painful. Between what she’d learned about her mom and her dad, adding Mark into the mix was just too much. So much in such a short amount of time. Jen held the stack of papers to her chest and thought about what her next move would be. Should she stay and become a partner or leave and risk everything in New York? Leave Mark behind?

  27

  Jen rode the elevator to the lobby, picking at her clothes along the way. She’d been so nervous she couldn’t even eat any breakfast. Day of truth for her and the decision she needed to make when it came to what she wanted to do with her life. When she got to the lobby, Mark sat in one of the chairs, asleep.

  She thought about just barreling past him, but she couldn’t bring herself to do it. Part of the reason she hadn’t let him up last night was because she knew seeing him in person would be too difficult for her. She knew it would be hard to resist him, even if he’d betrayed her. After the revelation from her dad, the fact that he’d applied to the fellowship behind her back—even taking her artwork without her permission—was such an inconsequential thing, except for how it would impact them and whatever relationship they were building.

  He’d applied for the fellowship, not because he was trying to control her, but because he tried to do something he knew she would be way too afraid to do for herself. Keira asked her for some of her artwork before, but she’d always put off giving her any. She had no confidence in her art, but he had. He’d seen something there and so had Keira, and he’d done what he needed to do to give her a chance to live up to her potential. That was an entirely different thing that what her father had done.

  Her father tried to control the outcomes in her life, tried to make everything as safe and wrapped in cotton wool as he could. Her father had always tried to keep her tied down, while Mark tried to let her free. Even if that meant she was free to be without him. She didn’t know how that made her feel. She’d hoped that he would want to keep her close and not let go. Being let go was a lot scarier than holding on.

  When she put her bag down and tapped him on the shoulder, he jumped and stared up at her.

  “Jen! You’re here. What time is it?” He looked around, eyes widening at the bright morning sun streaming through the large lobby windows. He rubbed his hands down his face and yawned.

  “It’s 8 a.m. I’m on my way to the office. I need to give them my decision about becoming partner.”

  “Okay.” He stood. “Jen, I’m sorry for what I did. I know I’ve said that too many times to count in our relationship. I’m always screwing things up when it comes to you and I don’t know how to fix it. I didn’t apply to the fellowship for you to push you away, or to make the decision for you. I did it because I knew that what I saw on those canvases was like nothing I’ve seen before. It made me feel things I’ve never felt before and if I had a chance to help you show that to other people, I knew that I needed to do that.” He gripped both of her arms, running his thumbs up and down her arms.

  “I know that you’re an excellent lawyer. I know you can do great things with that part of your life, but you’ve done it, and I’ve seen how you are, both when you’re creating and when you’re doing your law thing. I know you can be happy doing both, but I know that art calls to you in a way that being a lawyer doesn’t.”

  “It’s a choice I need to make for myself,” she said, stepping back.

  “Of course,” he said, dropping his hands from her arms. “I know. But I wanted to tell you what I saw and why I did what I did. Even if you can’t forgive me, I wanted you to know that I didn’t do it because I wanted to control you. I tried to get you out of the box and out of your head. Give you more choices.” She glanced down at her phone, checking the time. This partners’ meeting changed the course of her life and she couldn’t be late. Her palms were already sweaty in anticipation of how things would change.

  “I’ve got to go, Mark.” Jen bent down and picked up her bag without looking back. It would only make it harder if she looked back.

  Sitting outside of the partners’ offices for the second time this week, Jen was much less nervous than the last time. Her legs weren’t bouncing and her hands weren’t clammy. She chose to look at that as a good sign that she made the right choice.

  Brinxley opened the door and waved her in.

  “Jennifer, so glad you decided to come by this morning.” He guided her to a seat opposite him and took his seat behind his desk. The bright early morning light of the city shone through his floor-to-ceiling windows, making the bustling city look calm and ethereal.

  “Mr. Brinxley, I can’t take the partnership offer. It was very generous and I know it was the main reason I gave for my request to start at the firm, but I don’t think that it would be a good fit for me now.”

  “May I ask why?” He seemed taken aback by her refusal.

  “I couldn’t take the position knowing the influence that my dad had over your decision, and I think there might be another path I’m going to pursue.”

  “Jennifer, I want to assure you that your father had nothing to do with our decision.”

  “He didn’t?”

  “No, not at all.”

  “But having him coming on board—wasn’t that a part of the deal to make me partner?”

  “He may think so, but it didn’t factor into our decision at all, especially after your handling of the Gabe Stevens case. We were already going to make you partner. His talent management agency will provide us with a valuable relationship that will carry over for years, decades if we play our cards right. That along with your management style and outputs makes you a natural fit. Your team is one of the highest producing and least stressed in the whole firm.”

  “What about my father?”

  “Well, if the renowned Lewis Taylor tells you he’s willing to leave his current firm and move to yours just to be closer to his daughter, we would be fools to turn him down.”

  “Closer to me?” she squeaked.

  “Yes, Jennifer. I believe that was why he approached us in the first place. I have a daughter of my own, and I know that if she moved across the country, I would do my best to find a way to be close to her. I believe that his decision was based on wanting to be nearer to you.”

  “Thank you for clarifying all of this for me, Mr. Brinxley.”

  “Does it change your mind at all?” He looked hopeful. She thought over what he’d said about her dad and about the firm’s decision to make her partner.

  “No,” she said, shaking her head. “No, I’m sorry. It doesn’t.”

  “I had to ask. And I wish you well in whatever it is that you will be embarking on after you leave.” He stood and walked around to her as she stood.

  “Thank you. I’ll be able to stay a bit longer and I’ll ensure that everything is completely wrapped up when it comes to Gabe’s case.” She walked to the door, feeling lighter by the second.

  “I appreciate that, Jennifer.”

  Jen got to her office and slid down into her chair. Glancing around at all the papers and folders, the weight of the decision was no longer on her shoulders. She started to go through the files, assigning them to different people on her team and figuring out what she could wrap up in the next month or so. She didn’t have to be in New York for the fellowship for another two months. It seemed like working for a month and then taking a month off would be a good option. Help her get things set up and take a breather as she stepped into her new life.

  Although she was taking a huge leap, she was ready. This was the right thing for her. She needed to mix things up and stop playing it so safe. Deep in her bones, she knew this would change her life. Things had always come easy for her and now Jen would see if it really was all because of her father, or if she blazed her own path. To think of where she could be in a year. It was exciting and terrifying, but it wasn’t a decision without sadness and loss. Mark. She’d be leaving him behind. There was no way that he would ever leave The Bramble behind. It held such an important place in his heart and it was his livelihood, and she would never ask him to. But she needed to do this. He believed in her, so maybe they could find a way to make it work. People did long distance all the time, right? They could still see each other … maybe.

  28

  Mark sat out in the lobby area of the converted warehouse in front of his huge industrial desk made of old car parts. His leg bounced up and down and he squeezed his knee, smoothing his pant leg to stop it. The green haired receptionist came out with an even greener wheat grass shot and a bottle of water on a tray. He held his tie back as he leaned over to take the shot. The strange earth flavor hit his throat and he grimaced. Grabbing a bottle of water, he chugged it and smiled at the receptionist weakly.

  She smiled and sat back behind the hodge podge art deco behemoth of a reception desk.

  “Mark! Why didn’t you tell Maggie it was you when you made the appointment? Bramble Incorporated—I didn’t even make the connection. Get back here!” Liam held out his arms and gave Mark a hug, then slung his arm around his shoulder and pulled him along through their offices. The open-plan office covered the expensive space in colored lights, giant projection screens, and standing desks. There were nap pods, ping-pong tables, arcade games, and a rock-climbing wall.

  Liam led him into his fishbowl office that had glass walls on all sides and motioned to the plush couches in the corner. He sat on one and directed Mark to the one next to it.

  “So, you have a proposition for my company? An investment opportunity, Maggie said in the meeting invite.”

  “Yes, I do. You may or may not know this, but Jen is an amazing artist.”

  “Ah, you want us to commission a few pieces.” Liam peered out of his office, checking it out. “We probably have some space. What were you thinking?”

  “No, that’s not it. She’s actually been tapped for a McGuffin Fellowship.”

  “I’m not going to pretend to know what that is, but I’m guessing it’s impressive.”

  “It’s really impressive. You can’t even send in your work. You have to be nominted, and there are only a handful of nominators in the whole country. She was selected over hundreds of nominees.”

  “Okay, what does this have to do with investing?”

  “It doesn’t, not really. She needs to be in NYC if she accepts the fellowship. It’s a three-year program, fully funded. They give her space to work, a generous stipend, and all the mentorship she needs.”

  “New York.”

  “Yeah, I know.”

  “What are you going to do?”

  “I want to sell The Bramble to your company. An investment.” Saying those words nearly sucked the air out of his lungs, but if he were going to sell it to anyone, he would rather sell it to Liam. He knew he would take care of it. He could trust him with it.

  “Wow, really? I know how much that place means to you.” Mark’s throat tightened and he nodded his head.

  “What would you do if you sold it to me?”

  He quickly detailed the loans that Cheryl had taken out, and the agreement that they’d made after they’d found out about them. “I’d take care of all of that and take the rest and move to New York with Jen. I love her, man, and I’ll follow her wherever I need to.”

  “That’s intense. Are you sure about this?”

  He nodded again. “Yeah, I’m sure. You’ve known me a long time and when I’m sure about something, I’m sure.” Liam stared at him, unblinking for a long time. He started to shift in his seat.

  “I’ve got all the financials and cash flow information here, if you want to take a look.” He held out the folder, but Liam shook his head and waved it off.

  “How about this? How about I buy out Cheryl’s portion of The Bramble, including the loans, and take it over while you’re gone?”

  “That’s really generous of you, Liam, but I need to have money to live off of in New York. I’m not going to mooch off Jen.”

  “I wasn’t finished. What if I take care of the mess that Cheryl made with The Bramble, but also invest in you? You can open another place in New York.” Mark had to practically pick his jaw up off the floor.

  “Your company—” Liam shook his head.

  “No, not my company. Me. I want to do this. I’ll run The Bramble while you’re away and give you the capital to start up a new place in New York. What do you say?”

  “Liam, that’s crazy. I don’t know a thing about the New York market other than it’s ridiculously cut-throat and a lot of places don’t even make it a year. And you don’t know anything about running a bar.”

  “But you have experience, you’ll have the capital you need, and I wouldn’t just hang you out to dry. I have some connections in New York I could call up to help you get started. And I’m sure I can figure it out here on my end. I can shadow you for a while, learn the ropes. It would be a good change of pace.”

  Mark’s mouth opened and closed. “I don’t even know what to say. Why would you do this for me?”

  “You’re one of my best friends. I know I’ve dropped off the face of the earth with this whole project here,” he said, waving his arms at everything going on behind Mark, “but if I’m going to be successful, why shouldn’t I share that with my friends? I know Lucas would feel the same way.”

  “How are you going to run The Bramble and this place?” Liam hesitated and glanced over his shoulder again. Letting out a deep sigh, he shook his head.

  “I’ve been thinking about leaving for a while. It’s not as fun as it used to be. Being a big boss and having so much riding on what I’m doing isn’t what I signed up for. It was supposed to be a fun project where I got to hang out with friends.” Liam gazed through the glass wall past Mark and a sad look came over his face. “It’s not what it used to be. I think The Bramble would be a way for me to change my outlook. Maybe snap me out of my funk.”

  “That’s more than I would have imagined, Liam.”

  “So, what do you think? Do we have a deal?” Liam held out his hand to shake, and Mark took it. This could be the start of his new future. An unknown and daunting one, and now he just had to convince Jen to let him stay at her side.

  Jen stood outside The Bramble and smoothed out her skirt. She’d come straight from the office and wanted to speak him as soon as she could. It was still surreal to her that she’d actually done it. She’d told her boss and quit her job, a job she rocked, to become an artist. Feeling like a complete cliché, she pushed open the front door and gave Charlie a small wave.

 

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