It has always been John Omally's secret ambition to become a rock star. In his youth he mastered air guitar and wardrobe-mirror posing, but he lacked that certain something. Talent. But at last an opportunity has arisen for John to get into 'The Industry'. A band called Gandhi's Hairdryer are looking for a manager, so all John has to do is persuade them that he is the new Brian Epstein. It should be a piece of cake. But - and there's always a but - there is something rather odd about this band. Something other-worldly. It might be the lead singer, whose voice has the power to heal. Might she be an angel, perhaps? Or could she be the Devil in disguise? Because, after all, the Devil does have all the best tunes. And this is Brentford. In this, his final offering of the twentieth century, Robert Rankin returns to the town of his birth, the friends of his youth and one of the loves of his life: Rock Music.

Pirates of Savannah Trilogy: Book OneSold in SavannahFollow a group of English prisoners as they are sold at auction to the highest bidder. The odd collection of fellows battle inhumane living conditions, sail the salty seas, and fight deadly pirates to try their hand at a new life in General Oglethorpe's colony of Savannah, GA.Pirates of Savannah Trilogy: Book OneSold in SavannahFollow a group of English prisoners as they are sold at auction to the highest bidder. The odd collection of fellows battle inhumane living conditions, sail the salty seas, and fight deadly pirates to try their hand at a new life in General Oglethorpe's colony of Savannah, GA. Can they escape the stigma of their past and survive in this New World? This historical fiction trilogy is a fun adventure in a Pre-Revolutionary War setting. It follows fictional characters through an actual timeline and is packed full of real people, places and events. This novel is appropriate for young adults and beyond.Please note: There are two versions of this novel, one for adults and one that has been adapted to be the first in a trilogy of novels for young adults. If you spend your booty on this, you're buying the young version, yarrr.

Growing up on the Isle of Moon, Brigitta knows nothing of her past, except that she is Embraced: born with powers that forced her into hiding. Everything changes when she learns she’s a princess, hidden away from her villainous half-brother who now rules the kingdom. But he knows about Brigitta, and he’ll do anything to get her back. Unless a certain roguish pirate has anything to say about it… Rupert is both an infamous pirate and a sorcerer with the power to harness the wind. He’s been waiting nineteen years for revenge—and he needs Brigitta to get it. What begins as a kidnapping of the fiery beauty turns into a fierce attraction. But can he win the captive princess’s heart?

Have you ever walked into a half-empty Parisian restaurant, only to be told that it's "complet"? Attempted to say "merci beaucoup" and accidentally complimented someone's physique? Been overlooked at the boulangerie due to your adherence to the bizarre foreign custom of waiting in line? Well, you're not alone. The internationally bestselling author of A Year in the Merde and In the Merde for Love has been there too, and he is here to help. In Talk to the Snail, Stephen Clarke distills the fruits of years spent in the French trenches into a truly handy (and hilarious) book of advice. Read this book, and find out how to get good service from the grumpiest waiter; be exquisitely polite and brutally rude at the same time; and employ the language of l'amour and le sexe. Everything you need is here in this funny, informative, and seriously useful guide to getting what you really want from the French. Stephen Clarke is a British journalist and the internationally bestselling author of...

A hot–air balloon race! What could be more fun? Then again, we're talking about Wally McDoogle, the world–renowned "Human Catastrophe."My Life as a Broken Bungee Cord keeps readers on the edge of their seats as one calamity builds upon another until, with his life on the line, Wally learns what it means to FULLY put his trust in God.

Born prematurely, Christoff wasn’t as big or as strong as his older brother or the other younglings in the village. Unable to fit in, he does the best he can, helping his father and mother on their farm. His life changes when the mountain near their farm awakens. Believing he is the only one who can quiet it, he retreats to the mountain to watch over the village that shunned him. A hermit for centuries, he dreams of the day he can move on to his next life; a life that he hopes will give him a chance of finding his true mate. He knows his time has come when the mountain begins to tremble again. What he doesn’t expect is a group of younglings who suddenly appear in the hopes of saving a thing called Christmas. When the mountain erupts, he never expects to awaken on a strange planet light years away, or to meet an unusual woman who sees beneath his deformity to the warrior hidden within. Can the love of a special woman and her family heal Christoff’s tortured soul? Find out what happens when the Goddess Aikaterina gives The Old Dragon his very own special Christmas.

A blazing collection of responses to the U.S.'s shocking annexation threats and the swell of Canadian national unity that followed, from a remarkable array of Canada's sharpest and most influential minds.2025. Donald Trump is president. And he is insisting that Canada is for sale. It feels disorienting, even existential, to watch a trade war escalate and to hear an American president vow to make Canada “the 51st state.” Amid this disorientation, there is an urgent question: how do we meet the moment? This is not the first time we have had an identity crisis resulting in a swell of Canadian pride, but it is the first time many Canadians have experienced the direct threat of American imperialism knocking so loudly on our country’s door. The fact that treaties can be broken, that resources can be stolen, and that the consequences of land theft include loss of culture, ritual, and identity is not new to the Indigenous and refugee peoples living in...

From USA Today bestselling author Leslie Langtry comes a hilarious mystery that will leave you laughing 'til you cry...It's been years since ex-CIA agent Merry Wrath was undercover with Carlos the Armadillo in Colombia. So why is Teo the Tapir suddenly in Who's There, Iowa looking for her? Merry and Teo were not on the best terms back then, especially after he attempted to blow her up. Is he in town to get revenge, or is he telling the truth about wanting to retire and let bygones be bygones?It's a question that becomes much more important when a mutual colleague is murdered in Merry's garage. Suddenly Merry wonders if Teo did it to frame her. As usual, this isn't a great time for a dead body, since Merry is having trouble teaching her troop to use drones responsibly, her twin taxidermist sisters-in-law are trying to keep Merry from spilling their big secret, there are rumbles of a sexist schism in the teenage Cult of NicoDerm and there's an issue...

He was different. His one, lidless eye could see in, through, past.It drove him insane.But then, he couldn't see anything... And that was so much worse.He was different. His one, lidless eye could see in, through, past.It drove him insane.But then, he fell, injuring himself badly. He couldn't see anything... And that was so much worse.

A hot little novella in the Prognosis seriesSuper sexy billionaire fertility doc, Nathan Trent, is a man who has everything, except the wife who loved and left! Now, after ten years, he wants her back - to help secure a vital business deal. And he's not taking no for an answer.Dr Jacqueline Callaghan loves her secluded life tucked away in a little rural haven tending to the animals in her veterinarian practice and being a part of a small community. She's not going anywhere.The last thing Dr. Rich List expects on his mission to bring Jacqui home is to be walloped by a biblical flood and floored by a severe dose of the flu putting him totally at Jacqui's mercy as she nurses him back to health.Once he's better, Nate calls in an old debt to convince his estranged wife to temporarily reconcile. Jacqui reluctantly agrees with one condition – when the the deal is done, they have to finally get that divorce.Except neither expected their reunion to be so shockingly hot. Or for their eventual parting to be so reluctant. But sexual chemistry alone cannot fix irreconcilable differences, not when they run as deep as theirs. Not even when Nathan offers Jacqui the one thing she wants the most – a baby...

There's too much fun to be had in the snow to sleep through the winter season! At least that's what Louise thinks. In this story designed to engage early readers, charming characters combine with simple text, lively illustrations, and laugh-out-loud humor to help boost kids' confidence and create lifelong readers!Snow has fallen and the pond is frozen, so Arnold knows that—as a bear—it's time to hibernate! But Louise insists that he'll miss all the fun winter things if he does, so she convinces him to try hibernating like a chipmunk instead. They'll sleep for a short time, wake up to go sledding or have a snowball fight, and repeat! The only problem is, Arnold can't seem to keep his eyes open. What if he can't stay awake for the winter fun? Exciting, easy-to-read books are the stepping stone a young reader needs to bridge the gap between being a beginner and being fluent.

A story of Mr Lucullus Fyshe and other plutocratic members of the Mausoleum Club --This text refers to an alternate Paperback edition. --This text refers to an alternate Paperback edition.

Since she was young, Cher Rivers knew she was not the kind of girl who got what she wanted. A girl who could hope. A girl who could dream. She knew a happily ever after just wasn't in the cards for her. In love for years with the last bastion of the 'burg's eligible bachelors, Garrett Merrick, Cher worked hard at making him laugh. Being one of the guys. Having him in her life the only way she could. All this knowing he was in love with another woman. The Merrick Family is known for loving deep. So when Cecelia Merrick was murdered, it marked the Merricks in a way none of them recovered. Both Cecelia's children found love. Both turned their backs on it. But Garrett "Merry" Merrick knew in his soul the woman he divorced years ago was the one for him. Until the night when Cher took Garrett's back and things changed. The Merrick family loves deep. They also protect fiercely. And with his eyes finally open, Garrett sees the woman who truly is for him and he goes after her.

From the legendary comedic scholars who illuminated the tour de force Twilight so brilliantly in the New York Times bestselling Nightlight comes The Hunger Pains, a hilarious send-up of the immensely popular dystopian young adult novel, The Hunger Games. The classic parody of The Lord of the Rings is back! With a brand-new "boreword" by Henry Beard. The Power almighty rests in this Lone Ring. The Power, alrighty, for doing your Own Thing. If broken or busted, it cannot be remade If found, send to Sorhed (the postage is prepaid). It's up to Boggie Frito Bugger and his band of misfits—including inept wizard Goodgulf Grayteeth, halfwit Spam Gangree, twins Moxie and Pepsi, and Arrowroot of Arrowshirt—to carry the Great Ring to Fordor and cast it into the Zazu Pits. Can they avoid death by hickey tree and escape the dread ballhog? Can the fellowship overcome the narcs...