Bent arrow, p.1
Bent Arrow, page 1
Contents
Title Page
New Toys: Take 1
New Toys: Take 2
Ugh: Take 3
Take Me, Please
Broken Arrow
Nice and Bad
Backup's Always Good
Back at It
Where do Junkies Go?
The Gang's All Here
Waiting Out the Night
Stupid Vampires
Gross-Fest
The Handover
Home Sweet Home
In Da Office
Gang in Action
You Again
Angry Angels
Lunch Time!
Calm Before the Storm
Poor Aunty
We Almost Go Nuts
Idiot
Keeping the Gang Alive
Memories
We Done a Bad Thing
How to Make a Vampire Talk
Reflections
Rest for the Wicked
We get a Visitor
We get Another Visitor
Team Vamp
Downtime
Ready and Waiting
Nervous Vampires
Into the Fray
Upstairs Action
Oops. Forgot
The Stuff of Nightmares
O Brother
On the Trail
Supermarket Sweep
Are You Kidding?
It Takes Time
Author's Note
Bent Arrow
Freaky Finders Book 4
Al K. Line
Get new release notifications first via the Newsletter
Copyright © 2021, Al K. Line. All rights reserved. This book or any portion thereof may not be reproduced or used in any manner whatsoever without the express written permission of the author except for the use of brief quotations in a book review.
This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, businesses, places, events and incidents are either the products of the author's imagination or used in a fictitious manner. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, or actual events is purely coincidental.
New Toys: Take 1
It was becoming a habit, but I giggled to myself as I carefully peeked around the corner of the graffiti-covered brick wall, ensuring little more than a single lens of my orange shades and minimum head flesh were potential targets. This guy didn't know what was about to hit him, and I laughed again at my own utter awesomeness.
Then Aunty, utter twat that she undoubtedly was, sprang five feet in the air, yelped, whacked her head on a sign protruding from the wall, landed, screamed, stumbled forward muttering about the stupid Trousers of Awesomeness, before grabbing me at the waist and pinching me until I squealed.
I sighed. I didn't need to bother looking, but I looked anyway, knowing I no longer had to employ any undercover operations ninja skills and instead just watched our mark leg it down the street and out of sight.
I turned to Aunty, my displeasure evident, as I moved to remove my shades and burn her to a crisp with a look. Yes, I can really do that.
Aunty backed away and held up her hands to cover her eyes. "It wasn't me, it was the trousers!"
"Excuses, excuses," I hissed. "You ruined my perfect plan."
"What perfect plan?" she asked as she leaned against the wall to help her stand. "Spy on him, then shoot him with your stupid new toy?"
"Yes. You got a problem with that?"
"It's stupid."
"You said that, and no it isn't."
"Is too." Aunty tried to adjust the trousers around the crotch, screwing up her face as her hand delved deep.
"Stop that!" I ordered. "It's so gross."
"What? I'm trying to get comfortable. These damn trousers have shrunk."
"It's not the trousers that have shrunk," I snickered, eyeing her midsection.
Aunty got right up in my face and peered at me with that special look reserved for idiot men. "Exactly what is that supposed to mean?"
I took a step back and stammered, "It's not only Boris who's been eating all the pies lately," I said bravely, hardly moving away at all.
"I'll have you know I'm the same weight I was when I was nineteen."
"How'd you know? We haven't got scales."
"I can just tell, alright?"
"Whatever." I waved away her nonsense and regained my composure then scowled at her. "You changed the subject! This is about you ruining what was a perfect gotcha moment. I was gonna use this." I thrust my new bow forward and shook it in her face. It was awesome. Sleek black lines, lightweight but made of some kind of indestructible material like awesomeite or some such thing. Even the bowstring was black, making it perfect ninja material for sneaking up on the fuckers and giving them an eyeful of ninja arrow.
"Boys and their toys," sighed Aunty, delving deep into the Pants of Power once more and forcing me to look away.
"It's not a toy, it's for work!" I protested, stroking the black shaft and going, "Mmm." Aunty stared at me quizzically.
"What is it with guys and violent gadgets? Like you need it. You've got those eyes, you can burn people to a crisp by touching them, and now you've got the Essence. You can blast 'em good, you lucky sod."
"Blah, blah. This is different. It's a bow of incredible power, made of a strange substance not known to man, and the arrows are unbelievable. I can shoot anything, anywhere, and I always hit my mark."
"As long as you can see it," she reminded me.
"Well, yeah. Duh. Damn, you've sidetracked me again. Right, now, where was I? Oh, yes, you being an utter fuckwit and messing up my bounty. I told you to stay at home, but oh, no, you had to come, didn't you?"
"You asked me!" wailed Aunty. "You specifically said, 'Please come with me, he's big and scary and I need your amazing abilities in case I get into any bother.' Don't try to deny it."
"I most certainly will! That is exactly not what happened. You were on the sofa, crying and being girly, hugging a cushion, dreaming of ice-cream because you ate all we had, so I offered to help you out of your funk."
"Funk? FUNK!? I'll have you know that I was in the best of moods and you were being pathetic and…"
It went on like this for some time.
New Toys: Take 2
"Do not," I warned as I turned to Aunty for a moment, "screw this up. Keep quiet, don't antagonize the trousers, and keep your trap shut."
Aunty pretend zippered her mouth, but still managed to give me a glare and make my stomach churn. Damn, she was a feisty old hag. Um, I mean, lovely lady who looked younger than her years. You know, not that she's old or anything.
"Right, now let's get him." I giggled like a kid with a new toy, because I had one, and twanged the bowstring with a satisfaction that made my tingly bits tingle, then cautiously peered around a wall very similar to the last one. I inched my head forward, exposing the merest hint of my head, enough for an eye to get sight of our mark. He was loitering outside some seedy dive of a club, the rainy autumn day soaking him, and us, through, where ladies came and went wearing little more than umbrellas and high heels. It was a strip club-cum-brothel and it was not the kind of place you frequent if you valued your health or your money.
He was trying to chat up women who ignored him or hurried past with a quick word before being swallowed up by the dank darkness within. The bouncers ignored him best they could as they knew better than to have a cross word with this degenerate. Every so often he said something that made them bristle, yet still they held their tongues. That's how worrying a character this dude was. Not that I was worried. We'd dealt with much worse and even got the better of several. I had my new secret weapon too, and was itching to use it.
I'd get this greasy sleaze ball, and no mistake. I ran my hand through my own long dark hair, worried it looked as lank as his. I felt like washing too, as he gave off this air of greasiness even from this distance. His jeans were filthy, his leather jacket stitched together by years of vomit and food sludge, and his cowboy boots were red and shiny and I liked them. Damn, this was an odd one and it wasn't like peculiar dudes were hard to find.
"Oh, and a vampire too. Did I mention that?"
"You fucking what!?" shouted Aunty.
"Oops, did I say that out loud?"
"Yes, you utter dick sponge."
"What's a dick sponge?" I mused. "No, don't answer that," I told her, putting my hand out in front of her stupid face. I sighed, and stepped around the corner. Yep, he was gone. I turned back to Aunty to scold her good and proper then realized this time it was actually my fault so just let her smugness wash over me without it affecting me at all.
"Take three?" I asked.
Aunty nodded.
Ugh: Take 3
It was gonna be a long day. It had already been a long week, and it was only Monday, but when you're a Freaky Finder these things seem to have a habit of getting all messed up and turned upside down.
"Take three," I sighed. Cautiously, and I mean super, extra, mega-ninja cautiously, I put the teeniest tiniest bit of my face around the corner.
The air popped, a Gap opened, Mimi and the two panthers pounced through and she asked, "What ya doin'?"
"Fuck off!" Aunty and I shouted.
Maybe we'd get lucky on take four.
Take Me, Please
"Oh Lord up above, please let us get this fucking knobhead this time before I have to kill Aunty for being so twaterastic."
Aunty kicked me in the shins.
"Oh yeah. Amen." I nodded up at the big guy in the sky, knowing he wasn't watching but not risking it a s we were on good terms these days. Not that he had paid us for the awesome job we'd done for him a matter of days ago. Back to being poor and needing cash, I'd taken this job without asking too many questions, and right now, as I stood in the drizzle with this old, inflated bag of wrinkly bones hopping about beside me complaining about her trousers and everything else, I kind of wished I hadn't bothered. But I had the bow, and I was damn well gonna use it.
"Just do it already," whined Aunty through chattering teeth. She hugged herself to warm up, but it would do nothing for the rain.
"Why are you only wearing a vest? And if you don't mind me saying so, it's a little low-cut for a lady of your years."
"I'll have you know I wear the same size vest as I did in my twenties!"
"Same bloody vest by the looks of it," I mumbled so she couldn't hear.
"I heard that!"
"No, you didn't. Anyway, just sayin' that maybe you should dress more appropriately."
"What, like you do? Look at you with your leather jacket and stupid green shirt and those jeans. Ugh, so dated."
"It's a timeless look, and I'm young, I think, so nah." I stuck my tongue out at her, that'd show her. "Now, to business."
"Go on then, do it. Just be quick, I'm freezing."
Yet again, and I'd lost count now, I peered cautiously around another corner and found my mark. This dude really did like to hang out at the sleaziest places. You'd have thought he'd be more careful with us after him, but that just showed his bravado and stupidity. He thought he was untouchable, that he was too powerful and too fast of foot to ever get captured. He was about to learn that Freaky Finders always got their mark. At least sometimes.
He was laughing and joking with a group of very nervous drug-dealers ranging from early twenties to well into their forties with a couple of kids thrown in for good luck. Probably the ones who took all the risk and held on to the goods in case of trouble. Not that they dealt in your regular kind of drugs, these were dealers of a very different ilk entirely. The Freakverse is full of weird shit, and even weirder people, and they have peculiar peccadilloes. They like to get low, they like to get high, they like to get utterly off their tits. Vampires are no exception. They thrive on it. They crave it. They need it. They are addicts.
Blood addicts.
But it isn't only the blood, it's the actual high. When they suck on a human they get their power, their life force, and it strengthens the vampire. But it's more than just food and a way to be immortal, it's the physical high that they adore more than anything else. Some are more addicted to this than others, and they kill more than their fair share not for the blood per se, but for the buzz it gives them. What if that could be bottled? What if deranged madmen of the wizardly kind could use spells to suck the life out of people? Not all of it, just enough so it could be concentrated, pared down to an intensity that made slurping on a human like licking a guinea pig in comparison? If you were a vamp and so inclined, then you'd love that shit, rip your granny into little bits and sell her off cheap if it meant getting your hands on such a prize.
That's what these dudes here had. Bottled life force of poor unfortunates who were drained regularly and probably lived utterly miserable lives, starved of their strength, little more than zombies, going through the motions of life without much in the way of joy. Numb to life, empty, just doing day-to-day shit without happiness or even sorrow. Empty inside. It happened more than you could imagine, and that's why so many Normals were so bloody vacant. That, or the crap jobs, the commute, the tiny houses, and the expensive cars.
Even the dealers in other people's misfortune hated this deadbeat. Hated, despised, and feared him. He joked about with them, leered and kept slapping them on the back and getting in their faces. They let him. Laughed along, and very loudly, because they knew what he was and what he could do. There is nothing worse than a human being who plain and simple doesn't give a shit, now think what that means if it's a vampire. It means you laugh at their jokes and take their crap because they are utterly unpredictable.
I was ready, I was willing, and I was able to take this monster down. I grinned before checking Aunty wasn't about to pull anything stupid, then lifted up my bow, reached behind me into the quiver and pulled out an arrow. It felt like holding dense air, so high, so sleek, so dark was the arrow I had to check I was actually holding the thing. The arrow sucked in the light, even the head was dark as night, and I notched it carefully, knowing it was sharper than Aunty's tongue after a bottle of Pinot.
I pulled back gently and felt the power surge into the bow and arrow, amazed yet again that I'd got it at all. Talk about a great deal I'd had—almost a steal. It wasn't just the strength of the bow and the ethereal nature of the thing, it was what it was capable of. I'd tested it repeatedly and it hadn't let me down yet, so I was utterly confident that this time would be like all the others. Granted, I hadn't used it on a living being yet, but all the practice made me sure of its capabilities.
So, feeling all kinds of awesome, I checked carefully around the corner, caught sight of my mark, and pulled back on the bowstring, ready to have at it. The mark was standing at the bottom of a series of steps leading up to the dealers' base, a crappy terraced red brick house in an even worse neighborhood, with one leg on the second step, leaning forward and leering at the dealers sat around trying to look confident and cocky but failing miserably. With the mark in my mind, I slid back around the corner just as I saw one guy hand over a stoppered vial of Vamp2, and at that precise moment I let the arrow do its thing.
This was no normal arrow. I wasn't even aiming at the target now, I was safe behind the wall, out of sight and out of the danger zone. It mattered not, for this bow and arrow worked a little differently to your regular gear. It would hit the mark no matter where he was.
The arrow shot forward then bent around the corner and raced down the street. I leaned back against the wall and sighed with contentment, waiting for the screams to start.
One second, then two, then three. There was a slight commotion, shouting and cursing and I swear I heard broken glass, but not the racket you'd expect when you'd killed a vampire surrounded by dealers. Aunty and I exchanged confused glances then both eased forward and peeked around the corner.
The dealers were on their feet, the mark still had his hand outstretched where he was taking the vial, but it was smashed, glass and liquid on the cracked pavement, them all arguing and blaming each her for the lost goods.
"I thought you said it couldn't miss," scoffed Aunty.
"It can't. Damn, I looked at the vial just as I let rip. It must have decided that was what I wanted to hit rather than him. Bugger."
"Then where's the… Ow!" Aunty leaped into the air. I readied myself for action with a cool pose and hands raised to blast whoever had attacked, and Aunty ran around screaming.
"At least we know where the arrow went," I said, staring at the sleek projectile sticking out of her ample behind.
"Get it out, get it out! Damn, it really hurts. Spencer, you utter knob muncher."
"Okay, calm down, it's just in your bum, no harm done. Stupid arrow, stupid vampire. Hold still," I warmed as I stepped up to her. I grabbed the arrow and yanked, but all it did was pull Aunty back towards me. "I think it's stuck. Damn, now he's sure to have heard us and done a runner again."
"This was definitely not my fault this time," moaned Aunty.
"I guess, although…"
"Don't you dare say anything about the size of my bum," she warned.
"Wasn't gonna,' I muttered. I so was.
"Come on, let's get you to the car. This may take a while. This moron will have to wait a awhile. Shame, but Aunty comes first." I gave her a winning smile; she scowled at me.
"Gee, thanks."
I bundled Aunty into the backseat where she lay on her belly with her legs bent up behind her and boy did she moan the whole way back to Freaky Finders HQ.
Such is the life of a Freak.
Broken Arrow
"Get it out, get it out," wailed Aunty from her prone position on the kitchen table.
